I'm bringing sexy back

Not quite, but I totally feel like I've lost some weight. I compared my pics from 188, 181 and 179 pounds and I am happy to report that my ass no longer starts in the middle of my back and my gut no longer completely overlaps my pants. :)

Weight:179 (still, gained two back and lost them this week, I slacked a bit since I was working so much)
Mood: pleased

Dear scale

Dear scale,

How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.
I loathe thee to the numerical display and kilograms and pounds
My soul can reach, when feeling overweight
For the ends of BMI and ideal weight.
I loathe thee to the level of every day's
Most fattening meal, by sun and candle-light.
I loathe thee freely, as women strive for size 5,
I loathe thee purely, as they turn to low carbs and Trim Spa.
I loathe thee with a passion put to use
In my old jeans, and with my childhood's candy.
I loathe thee with a hate I seemed to multiply.
With my lost pounds, --- I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if I choose,
I shall but love thee better after 40 more pounds.

Pants Shopping

So like most larger girls, I absolutely hate shopping for clothes. Swimsuits are the worst, but pants come in at a close second. The jeans I have been wearing the past few months are literally falling off of me, so it was time to get some new ones. Luckily, the boy's parents gave me a Macy's gift card for my birthday so I had some money to spend!

The last time I went pants shopping was actually my inspiration for beginning the whole weight loss thing, so I was slightly dreading it. My boyfriend was with me and I promised him I would make it fast because apparently I took forever last time (I was holding back my tears from being in the plus size section!). I had to settle for 16s last time. They were a little big, but I couldn't squeeze my ass into 14s. It resulted in me being miserable and sulky for a few days until I decided to do something about it.

This time, I was able to shop in the normal section (yay!) and I picked out a few pairs in both 14s and 12s (I was hopeful!), but I knew I would probably have to settle for the larger size. I went into the fitting room and decided to get my hopes and dreams dashed right away. I pulled out the 12s, slid them on and...buttoned them. Easily. After doing a few victory fist pumps, I quickly put the others back and paid for my small jeans (and they were on sale woo!). I had a bit of money left over and my boyfriend suggested I get a shirt or something to go with it, but instead, I opted to save the remaining balance for a pair of 10s in a few months! Go me! :D

Weight: 179
Mood: freaking happy

Tales from the Gym

Okay so, I realize I have gotten a bit boring to read and I need to include some of the more interesting things that happen on this journey of mine. Well, rest assured what follows is awesome.

I was at the gym on Tuesday and saw something absolutely amazing. There I was, working on my cable curls (55lbs, thank you very much!) when I saw this guy straight out of 1985. He was wearing a neon green tank top, one of those old school ones that go down really low on the sides and are baggy; purple shiny shorts that were probably too short for today's standards; purpl e socks and purple and white Reeboks. He was also a dark orange hue and had an epic mullet. It was shaved on the sides and long on the top and the back. While normally the mullet would have been the crowning glory, the fact that he wore aviator sunglasses inside the entire time trumped the hairstyle this time.

So Mr. Footlose is on my left side while I'm lifting and he brings over two 25lb. dumbbells and procedes to do standing rows, grunting like an animal the entire time. Let me point out here that I do my rows with 25lbs. with relatively no issues. This guy is acting like he is lifting a car. I suppressed my laughed and continued with my lifting, trying to mind my own business. He then THROWS down the dumbbells and runs to an exercise ball he has stashed nearby and starts laying on it. Not doing crunches or anything productive, just kind of laying there. Once he is done doing whatever the hell that was, he sprints around the machine I am on and goes to my left side, doing weird little hops the whole time. The he jumped up and down a few times with jazz hands and ran back around me to the dumbbells. He repeated this about 5 times. I was trying my hardest not to laugh while I did my curls and tricep pulldowns. I'm pretty sure I almost hurt myself a few times because I was shaking and biting myself trying not to crack up.

Things like this are what make my gym experience so amazing. I think I need to start doing a weekly segment on strange things I see while working out, because there are a LOT of weirdos at the gym. There's also a guy that resembles the pro-wrestler I spent all of high school in love with and I have managed to embarrass myself in front of him a few times. That's a story for another day though. :)

Weight: 181
Mood: tired...is that a mood?

Soooooo slow

I feel like I am crawling towards the finish line some weeks! I'm still steadily losing, but I want it to just hurry up already! I know it takes time, losing weight fast in unhealthy, blah blah blah, but I'm getting impatient. I've been sticking to my diet for the most part during the week with no problem, but then the weekend rolls around and I stuff my face. I guess it's not as bad as I'm making it out to seem, but every time I eat white bread or drink a beer, I start thinking about sugar turning to fat. I think I might be insane. It's entirely likely. :)

I suppose I should give up alcohol, that's what seemed to do the trick for me last time, but it's so hard when all I look forward to on Friday nights is kicking back and having a few beers. I enjoy my one night a week where I can do that. This has me so distraught I am making run-on sentences! Gah! Having all you can eat tickets for the Rangers 4th of July game probably didn't help my case. I probably ate my weight in hot dogs (but I left out the bun!)and I'm having some residual guilt over it. I did work out extra hard today to make up for it.

A guy at work that's a workout junkie told me to stop doing heavy weights and stick to high reps, light weight. The workout plan I'm on pretty much dismisses that as a myth. On one hand, I feel like I have put on a ton of muscle and to an extent, that's a good thing. On the other hand, I do feel like it's halting my weight loss since muscle weighs so much more. I know the numbers on the scale don't mean much, it's all about how I look and feel but I feel like a cow still! Now I'm rambling! I think I'm just having a bad day. Maybe on Friday when I weigh myself I will feel better about everything.

Weight: 181
Mood: Blargh

20 lbs down!!1!!1one!1!

Woooooohoooooo!

The low carb thing is totally working. Love it. I even ate Chinese food (with brown rice) and a giant piece of chocolate cake last night on my cheat day. Low carb whole wheat wraps are a lifesaver, as are Greek salads and hummus.

Working out is going awesome. I slacked a little bit this week since I had a migraine Sunday night/ Monday morning and didn't want to push it too much, but I've been keeping up with my lifting. When I announced I was down 20lbs as of today to my personal trainer, he said I look totally different than when I started. I guess I should take some update pics at some point! :D

32 lbs to go!

Weight: 182
Mood: Ecstatic

Blog Award from Rachel (soon to be Mommy!)

Rachel gave me this award for obsessively commenting on her blog. I don't read many other blogs, so I will have to pass this on once I have the chance to read some more (which I have been planning to do for ages). So, thank you Mommy-to-be over at http://pointme2theskyabove.blogspot.com.


Now, like many of these awards, there are a few rules that go along with receiving it:

1. Thank person who nominated you.
2. Copy the award. Paste it in your blog.
3. Link to the person who gave me this award.
4. Answer the 10 questions that come with the award.
5. Nominate of few of your favorite bloggers for the award.

Here are the 10 questions to answer:



1. Why do you blog?
I guess I blog because I like sharing my experiences with others and it adds an extra boost of motivation to keep going. I hope to influence friends (and awesome strangers who read this too!) to be healthy and to reach their goals as well. It certainly isn't an easy task, but it makes me feel good and want to keep going when I can share my progress with others. I may be starting another blog for my animation and art soon, so I can motivate myself to work on that too. >.>

2. What are your 3 best memories?
Hmmm...

1. College at NIU. I had a lot of fun there and although there were a lot of rough patches (I had a lot of issues for part of it), looking back, I can remember the good over the bad. I loved living with Rachel and our apartment and all of our drunken adventures. I loved going out to random parties, not knowing where the night would lead us. I had a lot of fun at work as well, too bad it didn't translate into fun in classes or I might have my degree by now...

2. Lollapalooza VIP tickets. 'Nuff said, this was freaking awesome. All you can eat, all you can drink (bad idea), Flogging Molly and NiN.

3. Spending time with Sascha. She was my middle school/high school best friend and we have since fallen out of touch. I wish we could rekindle our friendship, but I have no idea how to get in touch with her now. We spent most of our time together in high school, wrestled together after and sort of drifted apart after a misunderstanding on my 21st birthday. We had some awesome times together (concerts, her summer cabin, our obsession with Sailor Moon) and I will never forget her!

3. If you had to change your real name what would you change it to?
Princess Consuela Banana-hammock

4. What are five things you can't live without?
1. My computer.
2. My dog.
3. Music
4. The internet.
5. Books

5. What are the 4 best books you've ever read?
1. The Harry Potter series. Uh-may-zing.
2. Memoirs of a Geisha. I freaking love it.
3. To Kill a Mockingbird. This is a pretty common one, but it is still perfectly written and I love the story.
4. Rachel's Holiday. This probably isn't going to make any lists of classic literature, but I loved it and at one point in my life, it really spoke to me.
5. Anne of Green Gables. I don't care that it's written for kids or really old or whatever. I will always love it.

6. Tell me something unique and interesting about yourself.
I used to be a professional wrestler, from the age of 17 until I got hurt at 22 and had to stop. I was a superhero character and it was a lot of fun, but some of the people in "the business" really suck and I am glad to be rid of them. Because of this, I used to be in really good shape, but gained weight after my injury, which is the whole reason for this blog.

7. What do you love best about yourself?
My uniqueness. I'm certainly one of a kind and nothing is ever dull in my life. I'm constantly getting into scrapes and accidents and having to work my way out, learning something about myself in the process. I sound like a horrible 19th century novel. I'm bold and not afraid to speak my mind and tend to get along with guys more than girls because girls are catty and bitchy. I'm really laid back and love hanging out with friends playing video games or watching TV.

8. What is the best movie ever made?
Ever made? Uh...I'm sure that varies depending on who you ask. Personally, I like most of the movies on the "100 Top Movies" list AMC released and I can't really pick one. In terms of a movie I can watch over and over again, any animated Disney or Pixar movie would top the list. In the artsy movie snob way, I would have to say that Citizen Kane is probably the best.

9. If you had a "freaky friday" experience who would you trade places with and why?
Johnny Depp so I could fondle myself.

10. What's the best part about being a woman?
Free drinks. I can't think of anything else.